Our Man Flint

MP3

December 19, 2018

A dancing, swinging, good time on this episode because Chris has quit the synopsis. So guests Jacob & Sean dive right into this film to talk Mormon spies, a harp as a weapon, the distinct varieties of bouillabaisse, and the island of misfit Canadians.

• In this film the title character is played by James Coburn who is playing Flint as Spock.
• Paul adds that this is Spock in the love planet episode.
• Sean says this film is way better than Murderer’s Row, the last film we asked him to watch.
• It has happened, we broke Jacob with Our Man Flint.
• The sequel to this film is Austin Power’s favorite film.
• Chris is waiting for the future these 60s films promised. Where are the pneumatic tubes?
• The organization bent on taking over the world reminds Jacob of E.V.I.L. from Spongebob Squarepants. Also, who knew there was a SpongePedia?
• “To the computer!” Everyone ran to UNIVAC or more precisely the women who program it, Hidden Figures for real. Well, in a movie from the time.
• Flint can do anything! A kick ass Jesus figure. Remember when we watched UHF? Here’s a trailer from that film for Gandhi II.
• The “incredulous” claim that this movie is the basis for Rain Man.
• An Automan reference that only Chris gets.
• Every movie needs a Hans Gruber?
• It’s Devon from Knight Rider playing Devon in this film, but he’s a bad guy? Bland villain is bland.
• The supervisor programming women to be “pleasure units” is Mr. Whipple? Say it isn’t so!
• This movie was premiered in Jamaica and reviewer Pauline Kael thought that was the only reason this movie received positive reviews.
• Not going to lie, Jacob is obsessed with Jodorowsky. He always brings up The Holy Mountain. Is he challenging us to watch this?
• Obviously Zardoz stole the “programming” scene from Our Man Flint.
• BLANKETS!
• Darwin Deez has this music video made entirely from stock footage. Directed by Keith Schofield.
• Sets, logos, and other designs from this film are used in the TV show Land of the Giants.

Thanks for listening! This was a tremendous amount of fun thanks to Jacob and Sean. Check out Jacob on Twitter or his Slowne.ws. You can find Sean on Twitter and read his musings on open source and decentralization projects over at We Distribute.

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Masters Of The Universe

MP3

October 25, 2018

Paul & Chris fill another request from our friend, and guest Daniel J. Hogan. Joining us on our quest to save Castle Grayskull are Arden and Jen. On this show we decide Superman hates whales. We puzzle over He-Man carrying a rifle. Sweat-filled boots make choreography difficult. This episode is 16 milliparsecs long, or something.

• Intros done in a bad commercials from the past style.
• Here come the 80s via Dan, “Where’s the beef?”, Reaganomics, and “Just Say No” with Clint Eastwood.
• This episode’s film stars Dolph Lundgren “and his nipples.”
• What’s Frank Langella doing in this picture?
• Oh hey! It’s the principal from Back to the Future, actor James Tolkan. He’s from Michigan like our hosts, slacker!
• Other stars are Meg Foster from They Live! Courteney Cox, Tom Paris from Star Trek: Voyager, Robert Duncan McNeill and our favorite Billy Barty.
• Dan tells us how DC’s New Gods may have influenced the film.
• What no sequel? No worries, we’ll just tweak the script. This is how we got the Van Damme film Cyborg.
• Arden was all about the character Teela because actress Chelsea Field was a Solid Gold dancer.
• Let’s forget about this awful film and watch The Toys That Made Us or Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films.
• He-Man is not allowed to kill people. So, we get to see storm troopers and lasers instead of swordplay or scary Legend characters.
• Is the slippery nipple named after Dolph?
• Speaking of our star, he is ACTING!
• Dan points out that Courteney Cox’s character is going to leave their small town and move to Jersey. He wonders if this is a Dancing in the Dark reference.
• Snap has the power, not He-Man.
• Here comes a She-Ra reboot by Noelle Stevenson of Lumberjanes fame.
• Synth music is the key to the universe! We know because we’ve watched a better movie, Close Encounters of the Third Kind.
• Oh no, Paul gets into his Southern lawyer, chauvinistic robot voice from our Starcrash episode.
• Skeletor has THE GLOW.
• Paul’s comment about “laser nipples” reminds Chris, about a certain music video. Yup, save yourself some time and watch this music video, it’s basically a 3 minute version of the film.
• The robots swear in Transformers The Movie.
• Avoid the Noid! Dan tells us the actor who played Saurod was the Noid.
• Pons Maar, the Noid, was also a puppeteer for Dinosaurs, a favorite for some on our panel.

That’s it for this episode, each of our wonderful guests put on their space thongs and rode off on their hover boards. Thanks to Jen, Dan, and Arden for such a fun time. And we’re grateful that you took the time to listen. Good Journey!

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Bedtime for Bonzo

MP3

September 5, 2018

Friend of the show and the intelligence behind Clattertron and Foxes & Boxes, Daniel J. Hogan suggested this week’s film. Surely he’s chose it out of some sort of patriotism because it stars the commander in chief, Ronald Reagan. Oh, it also stars a chimpanzee. Pet Sounds Radio host Sarah Hoyles kindly joined us as well. We didn’t learn until the day of the show that she rarely watches films with animals! It was a pleasure to see things from her perspective. We hope you’ll listen to learn more.

• Don’t worry if you’re falling from an 8 story building, the Browder Life Safety Net will certainly break you in much more interesting way than the ground.
• Sarah reminds us of The Bear. Sorry for the spoilers, but it is 30 years old.
• Let’s not hurt animals in film Leonardo DiCaprio.
• Who is the moustached character in the photo? Is it Rappin’ Ronnie?
• Our show is not brought to you by 23andMe. Instead, we’re funded by listeners like yourself. And our moms.
• Chris thinks this film is a precursor to Three’s Company.
• Meanwhile, Dan points out that it may actually be the predecessor to Dawn of the Planet of the Apes.
• Bonzo is to be sold! What? Can’t we make money in the Iran-Contra affair instead?
• Chris steals a joke from Noises Off and it gets awkward.
• Dan reminds us, as does the film, to study our Freud.
• There’s a sequel? Oh no, Bonzo Goes to College.
• Bonzo was played by Peggy the chimpanzee. There’s a nice page here on this beautiful creature.
• Dan shares this wisdom from actor Dick Miller, if a chimp gets aggressive, bite him. He heard this story on another podcast, but their archives are behind a paywall.
• Tippi Hedren, the mom of Melanie Griffith, founded The Roar Foundation to provide sanctuary for mistreated exotic animals, educate the public and advocate for legislation.
• The insane trailer for Tippi Hedren’s film Roar. As it states, no animals were harmed in making the film but 70 of the cast and crew were.
• The 80s film that was far more than teenage angst, Project X, with Matthew Broderick and Helen Hunt.
• Movies from the past are an insight to the culture of their time. Eww, that Elivs film we watched.
• Can’t stop, won’t stop watching Leave It to Beaver.
• Dan suggests a few podcasts, Star Wars Minute, The Dollop, and The Adventure Zone.
• Congrats to our guest Sarah for joining the Entertainment One podcast network!

Thanks to you for listening! You can find us wherever you get your podcasts, Google, Apple, or your favorite apps. Be sure to check out the amazing Pet Sounds, we guarantee you’ll love it! You can find Sarah Hoyles on a number of social networks. Also, find our friend Daniel J. Hogan’s work on Clattertron.com. Again, he’s on a number of sites, just follow the previous link. And remember, never give or sell your chimps to Yale.

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Murderers' Row

MP3

August 29, 2018

You’ve heard of Bond, but what about Matt Helms? When your friends start taking the Bond movies in a direction you don’t like, you go out and buy the rights to another spy novel, of course. Dean Martin plays the hero in this drunken series of a spy films. They’re like spy film lite. Sean Tilley joins us to talk 8th grade biology, quitting villainy to make toy models, and Bond’s alcoholism problem. Join us in our hovercraft with projected scenes in the windows as we get saucy with Dean Martin.

• Oh look, a misogynist trailer for the film!
• A A Ron!
• Sirius Stuff was falsely arrested before they actually caught Sirius Black.
• Murderers’ Row is the second film in the series, the first was The Silencers.
• This film and You Only Live Twice largely influenced Austin Powers.
• Is this a comedy? Paul says at least he knew Doctor Goldfoot and His Bikini Machine was.
• Sean believes the B.I.G.O. headquarters is something from The Holy Mountain. While Paul thinks set pieces are borrowed from Forbidden Planet.
• “Juicero tried.”
• We get a lesson in Mod.
• Oh hey, Dean Martin’s character “dies” just like Bond in the last movie we watched, You Only Live Twice.
• The bad jokes abound so much that characters seemingly ignore Dean Martin like he’s Al from Quantum Leap.
• Is Karl Malden your Pollyanna villain or Chris’ Jack Klugman.
• Hey, when your dad’s the star of the film you can get your band, Dino, Desi & Billy in the picture.
• Dean Martin’s blocking during scenes, when he’s not talking, is basically the male gaze.
• Ironhead is actually Bender? He blows fire!
• The dancing style has confused us all, including Dean Martin.
• The parade float dress made of flowers with, yet another crazy, crazy dancing scene.
• Is Ironhead Inspector Gadget, perhaps?
• A Knight Rider reference? Yes please.
• Chris shares his love for Mom and Dad Save the World. Behold the light grenade!
• Why do we like Dean Martin more in Cannonball Run?
• Sean thinks this bad film is no The Room.
• Is it Mike Myers or Michael Myers, we always get those two deadpan comedians confused.

That was it for go-go dancing bombs and rat pack references. Thank you for listening and thanks to Sean Tilley for watching this film with us. Will he be back in Our Man Flint?

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You Only Live Twice

MP3

July 26, 2018

Like James Bond in this 1967 film, we’re back from the dead. As Chris returns from a mental health break, he challenges his sanity and that of Paul and guest, Arturo. This lack luster Bond film is so bad that even Connery vowed to quit afterwards. Should you be brave enough to watch the 007 film yourself, here’s a list of available sources. Or, Arturo says fly to Mexico and buy a copy of the film from Roger Moore and Sean Connery in a supermarket. Just watch out for the trap doors.

• Child author Roald Dahl wrote the script. As Paul said, “That explains a lot about this film.”
• Arturo was on our Montreal Sauce Halloween special.
• The James Bond Formula is a thing.
• Pervy Chris admits that his favorite Bond was George Lazenby in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service.
• Paul wants to cut the beginning of this film together with Gravity, or to have the astronaut pull an Iron Man like Mark Whatney.
• Space is dark according to this movie and The Expanse books.
• Did you know there is an Outer Space Treaty?
• The first scene with Bond has an amazing mix of racism & misogyny to truly disgust you.
• Did you know there’s a movie cars database? Sure there is and this is the 2000GT Aki drives.
• The Rock’s grandfather plays a henchman who Bond beats awkwardly with a couch.
• Arturo’s opinion that Bond drinks too much on the job has validity.
• Bond hits the chair like Riker.
• Does Connery play Bond in Zardoz.
• Paul does his Connery impression and Chris tries using Connery’s line from Dragonheart, but he sounds more like Brian Blessed.
• Little Nellie was an actual production model helicopter, the Wallis Autogyro.
• So are all the henchmen evil and it’s okay that they die? It’s the Clerks debate.
• Dr. Claw must be inspired by this film.
• Ninja school didn’t have a pommel horse for the Gymkata.
• So the “rocket guns” in the film are a real thing. They were stoked to have their product in the film. Too bad it was a terrible invention.
• Connery becomes Spock? Oh, no. It is much worse than that.
• When swimming from an exploding volcano hideout, you need a hat like a shark fin.
• Who will be the next Bond? Arturo says maybe Michael Fassbender.
• Paul compares Bond to Kirk from Star Trek. They are from a similar period and are a similar archetype.
• Arturo and Paul now want to watch a good Bond film, GoldenEye.

Thanks for listening to a lengthy show! Thanks to Arturo for joining us. Perhaps he should do the recap instead of Chris? His impression of Roald Dahl pitching the film is much shorter and hilarious. Stay tuned for more spy shenanigans this season. Up next is Dean Martin as Matt Helms in Murderer’s Row.

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